Self Improvement

Self-Improvement-There Is A Secret Equation That Guarantees Big Success

For the majority of people, the boulevard to personal transformation and self-improvement is a long and winding highway filled with difficult barriers. Drug companies in particular have capitalized on and created enormous fortunes because of the elusive search for the "Magic Pill" that will answer all of your prayers. As it turns out, there is a secret formula for success, and it begins in the human mind.

When it comes to self-improvement,one of the rules of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) is that "there is a positive intention behind all behaviors." And based on that law, when it comes to successfully eliminating negative behaviors, there is an equation that we should always keep in mind. I'll let you in on the secret equation in a minute. But I have a riddle for you to solve first.

Riddle: A minister made his son drink lye, which burned out the child's voice box. What was the positive intention behind this action?

If you are like 99.9% of the clients who have visited my office since 1978, you'll say something like: "There isn't any." But you would be 100% in error. To answer this riddle, first you have to detach the behavior from the positive objective of the behavior.

The preacher's son was cursing. And the minister believes that if his child curses, his soul will be condemned to Hell. So the answer is that the minister was burning out his child's vocal cords so that he couldn't curse. By doing so, he was saving his child's soul from being destined to Hell.

The secret formula for self-improvement successful change uses NLP and works as follows:

We should always respect the positive intent behind each behavior. If we have an urge to apply a behavior that we do not appreciate, we can quickly get rid of the impulse to use that behavior. What we must do is to find a different behavior to substitute in its place. To be successful, the new action must be as accessible and effective at accomplishing the same outcome, but be more consciously acceptable to you. We call this a REFRAME.

When clients come into my practice, the first thing I do is to take a detailed case history. Let's imagine that they come to my office and ask me to help them overcome their appetite. Experience tells us that the two main reasons that anyone eats excessively are: (1) for relaxation and pleasure; (2) because eating can be a behavior triggered by other behaviors that it has been associated with (a conditioned response). For instance, if a person eats while they are working on a computer, they will develop a conditioned response, and thereafter, every time they work on a computer they will get an urge to eat.

However, the above answer only takes into consideration the possible positive intention behind the eating behavior. What if they also have another behavior that is concerned in the equation? For instance: What if being tubby is also a behavior for this person? I can hear your mind grinding right now as you think, "Being overweight isn't a behavior, what are you talking about?"

Sorry but you could be totally off the mark. Here is a common textbook example that will clearly demonstrate the fact that being overweight can be a behavior. It can be a behavior because it can supply secondary gains.

Example: A woman falls in love. Her partner leaves her, and breaks her heart. Her subconscious mind wants to protect her emotionally and keep her from having her heart broken again. So it motivates her to get overweight to keep her out of relationships. That way she will not get her heart broken again.

Everyone is totally different. And sometimes there are subliminal elements at work causing neurotic behaviors. These are elements that are different for each person.

Here is another case: A woman comes into my practice complaining of an unmanageable compulsion to overeat at dinnertime. During my case history, upon questioning, the woman tells me about how she was never able to please her dad.

We did an age regression, and one of her early memories was of eating a meal with the family. And her dad was insisting in a very loud voice that she finish all of the food on her plate, even though she was stuffed. So she finished the food on her plate because of fear, and her father commended her for finishing all of the food. It was one of the only times in her life that she could recall her dad telling her that he was happy with her.

Shoot forward to the present. Her father has been dead for many years, but the subconscious program he installed is still operational. She still has an urge to finish everything on her plate, even if she is feeling stuffed, because by cleaning the plate, in her subconscious she is getting her dad's approval, and eliminating her own fear!

So if you find it difficult to make personal changes, please remember that there is a positive intention that causes all behaviors. And the formula for successful self-improvement is to use a different behavior that will realize the same secondary gains, but in a manner that is more consciously satisfactory to you, as an individual. The most effective way to get your subconscious mind to take the responsibility for making this kind of alteration for you is through using hypnosis and NLP to lose weight.

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